What Every Introvert Needs to Know About Networking When the Calendar Flips to 2011

By Allison Sousa

Allison Sousa
Level: Basic

Allison Sousa founded Word's Out in 2010 after several years of successfully offering marketing and public relations services on a freelance basis. During this time, ...

You hear about it all the time for a reason: Networking is where it's at! Before you cower under your chair, hear me out.

Informal Networking

Many people count on "word-of-mouth" to fuel the growth and success of their businesses. The "aha" link that isn't commonly made is that "word-of-mouth" is virtually synonymous with "networking!" While successful word of mouth referrals might not be a direct result of your own efforts, they are the result of those within one of your networks telling others about you.

If you are at all pondering the previous paragraph, then one of the first things to come to your mind should be the realization that you have networks. If you didn't, you wouldn't be seeing word-of-mouth referrals appearing at your door. So, whether you realize it or not, you are engaging in networking. You are connecting with someone, on some level, and giving them a reason to tell someone else about you.

Informal networking might take the form of serving your customers in a positive manner and asking them to share their experiences with their friends (Or, for the mega-introverts out there, "hoping" that they will share it with others to avoid passing out at the mere thought of asking them.)

It might be attending your weekly card clubs or coffee clutches. It might be communicating with friends & family. Or, you might belong to a civic club or other volunteer organization whose members know what you do for a living and regularly refer others to you because they know you're a nice guy. Regardless of the format, you are letting it be known who you are, what you do and what you seek, even if only to those closest to you. To my introverted readers, that is networking! (See now? It's not so bad!)

Formal Networking

So let's move on to a discussion about formal networking. It is typically the formal venues that scare the bejeebers out of introverts. While informal networking can be effective, make a resolution to take the next steps. Nudge yourself out of your comfort zone, find some formal venues, and polish & apply a few basic networking skills.

When most people think of networking, they think of chambers of commerce, Business Network International, e-Women and other organizations that list "networking opportunities" among their primary reasons for existing. These organizations offer meetings and events specifically designed around networking.

The beauty of planned meetings & events is that the networking "structure" is already in place. All you need to do is show up, make connections and build relationships. As an added bonus, the organizations worth their salt also offer training to teach you how to network before throwing you to the proverbial wolves.

Ramping up your networking efforts...gently, of course

Even without these organizations, you can creatively formalize your networking efforts. For example:

1. Have special business cards printed up that make the "ask" for a referral for you. Hand them out to your customers, friends, family, club members, church family, etc. You can even offer an incentive - like a discount on a future purchase - for generating referrals.
2. Keep in touch with your current customers to continue building trust and ongoing relationships. Make sure you have their contact information so you can send newsletters, thank you notes, birthday or holiday cards, coupons, etc.
3. Develop an online social media presence and position yourself as the "expert" in what you do. If your dislike of networking is surpassed only by your disdain for technology, then get help. You want to become a trusted, household name to your target markets and social media is an inexpensive way to build that network...at a comfortable distance, I might add.
4. Ask close friends or associates to introduce you to people or maybe even accompany you to a networking event. Having someone by your side that you know and trust can take a lot of the fear out of meeting new people and can help generate topics of conversation.
5. Partner with other business owners to generate cross-referrals. For example, if you are a plumber and a customer hires you to fix her leaky, outdated dishwasher, have the business card of a trusted appliance salesman handy. Likewise, that honest appliance salesman will tell a customer when a good plumber can save her dishwasher, instead of spending money on a new one, and will refer her to you.
6. Since most of us (even the outspoken extroverts among us) don't like bragging on ourselves, there are subtle ways to ask others to do the bragging for you. Place comment cards on your check-out counter. Ask for testimonials on your Facebook or other social media page. Let your happy customers do the bragging. The bonus to this strategy is added credibility for you and what you do.
7. Volunteer some time with a charitable organization for which you are passionate, that might benefit from your skills and talents. For example, if you are a graphic designer, you might be able to help the local food bank with its newsletter or posters for a special event. Handy with a hammer? Then check with your local Habitat for Humanity to see how you can assist on the next build. Volunteering is a great way to meet new people and further build your reputation, while helping your community at the same time.
8. Read, read, read! There are a plethora of books, blogs and other resources out there that can teach you how to network and even take the fear out of it. The more you engage your brain on the topic, the less threatening and more viable actually doing it will become.
9. Master the skill of being able to describe what you do in 60 seconds or less. Commonly called an "elevator speech," think of it as just that. Mentally place yourself in an elevator with the potential client of your dreams. You have 60 seconds to introduce yourself and engage his interest. What would you say? Could you do it in 30 seconds? Develop these tools. They will become priceless to you and if you have practiced them, will make networking much less awkward and much more rewarding.
10. Above all, be yourself! Remember, networking is just as much about building trusted relationships as it is about meeting new people and getting your name out there. Being true to yourself and your business is one of the best tools you have to help you climb the delicate trust ladder.

Once you really understand the benefits of networking and grasp the concept that each person you meet knows or comes into contact with hundreds of others, learning the tools becomes much less intimidating. You don't have to start by launching yourself into a formal networking group - although many of my own admittedly introverted colleagues have fessed up that doing just that has helped them immensely. Just do what feels comfortable and work up from there. Try to thoughtfully track your progress. At some point, you will experience an exponential shift in the power of networking. Heck. You might even think it's fun!

Allison Sousa, MBA, is the founder & president of Word's Out Marketing & PR, LLC, located online at http://www.WordsOutMarketing.com. As a member of the Ezine Articles community, she provides helpful and personality-packed articles on topics such as: communications, marketing, small business management, non-profit management, public relations, networking, social media and smart business. Allison invites you to offer suggestions for article topics or subscribe to her RSS feed by visiting http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Allison_Sousa.

2011 in Review

Many people are probably looking at the title to this blog and thinking. Hmm Sherman must be getting tired. He has this glaring typo. Well let me put all of your worries to rest . I not only am not suffering from a case of the sleepies but I am as excited and wide awake as I can be.
2011 IS going to be one of the best years of my life. So I justed wanted to tell you from the get go what this year will look like. Instead of looking back on the year and seeing what the year did to me, while I thrashed and avoided the pitfalls of life, I plan of making my own way this year. This year is going to become my instrument for change.
This is a huge departure from what we are all used to, I know. What we usually do is make resolutions of things that we hope to accomplish. We plan to loose weight or go on vacations, etc.. but about 2 or 3 weeks into the year we forget even where the paper was that we wrote down our goals.
With telling everyone what your year looked like in review you are literally speaking those things that you know will happen, into existence.
Once again, I'm hearing in the background grumblings of disbelief. That's alright. Don't let me rain on your parade of doubt. My job isn't to convince you of the facts. My job is just to report to you what I've already done in the year 2011. Your job is to sit in amazement as one by one these prophecies are fullfilled in your hearing. Or, you could adopt my philosophy and do the same thing. Speak of those things that are not yet as though they already are.

-During the month of January Linda (the Lovely Mrs Ray) and I started to read through the entire bible. We got some much closer, rekindling a past practice we had of talking before we went to bed.
-Also in the month of January, I finished a leadership development course for the HOPE organization. We started receiving our first clients and added new teachers, mentors and life coaches.
-Linda lauched her new business. She already got clients who were asking for her advice
-Linda and I celebrated 20 years of wedded bliss. Got some well deserved "me and my sweetie" time.
-My daughter Kisha made a major announcement to the family.
-Our business caught fire in the month of March. We added people at a rate that even amazed me.
-April and May were some of the weirdest months for weather. It cramped my style with working out but Linda and I both pushed through with our weight-loss program.
-For my Birthday I received a special gift from my grandchildren. I was so moved that I had to leave the party. (I hate people seeing me cry like a 6yr old school-girl)
-We finally got that event over with. The networking group mixer was a huge success.
-The fourth of July fireworks show was really awesome. This year we celebrated with the entire family.
-It took some time but that skeptical business partner finally joined us. Better late than never.
-Another group of grandchildren started school. They've grown so much.
-Linda and I came back from Florida. We had a great time and are excited about our next trip.
-Thanksgiving was at Mom's house this year. She made her famous Peas and Rice. I guess all of the whining worked, she used real coconut.
-Christmas was more than I imagined it would be. All of the kids and family were there this time. Bern and Tina had a special announcement along with Chris and Kim.

2011 had so many highs and lows but I will always remember it as a year of the greatest change for me and my family.

A Christmas Wish- Your Very Best

Today marks a huge milestone in the annals of sports. The UConn ladies basketball team does something that has never been done before. With todays win they have forever put their names in the history books as being the all-time consecutive wins leader in any sport. The last team to do such a feet was the UCLA Bruins Men's basketball team. Their feat accomplished many decades before.
The UConn team in and of itself isn't the real story. The real story is in the pageantry of sport and the determination of athletes of all stripes to achieve a goal. That is the real story. Many of you may have seen the movie "Facing the Giants". In this independent movie, produced by a local area church, the coach of a hapless group of students is trying to do something that had never been accomplished in their schools history. Their goal was to win.
The coach had to wrestle with the mentality of a group of people that was used to loosing. They knew  that they were losers and no one was going to sway their own opinion of themselves. Now if that aint a tough nut to crack, I don't know what is. Sometimes it is so hard to get people to believe in your dream. That's hard enough. Not everyone is going to believe in your dream. As a matter of fact, most people won't.
It was said that when MicroSoft was being founded that Bill Gates assembled a large handful of people in his garage and told them that one day there company was going to dominate the software jungle, 2/3rds of the people assembled walked out of that meeting. The rest as they say is history.
So most people won't embrace your dreams but that obstacle pales in comparison to the monumental wall that is erected by the unbelief of one towards their ownselves. This is the problem that the coach in our story was battling.
He, the coach assembled the team for a practice and was discussing the strategy for their game against another school. This game was going to be tough but the coach believed that his team could win. This was not the case for one of his leaders on the team, we'll call him Jake. Jake laid back on the grassy field and challenged the encouragement of the coach and said that he didn't believe that the team could do it. The next 5 minutes of this movie, "Facing the Giants" will forever go down in history, as one of the greatest dramatic moments in movie history.
The coach told Jake that he would prove to him and the rest  of the team that they had more in them than they ever could imagine. He challenged Jake to do an exercise that would prove his point. The manuever was called the "Deadmans carry". One man would walk on all fore's while carrying another man on his back. Jake happily said that he would do the feat at least 20 yards. The coach challenged him and said that he could go at least 30, but no matter the length, Jake would have to promise that he would give the very best effort that he could and not give up. To make things even more interesting, Jake would carry is load blindfolded.
As the exercise started, the coach calmly encouraged his team leader to keep going. Jake would ask from time to time, "How far have we gone so far, coach?" "Don't you worry about that, said the coach. You just give me your very best, you very best."
10 yards, 20 and then 30 yards passed. Jake was starting to show the signs of a man who was discouraged. "It's starting to hurt coach". Don't you stop Jake, you promised me that you would give me your very best. Now give me your best, your very best!!! Another 10, 20, and now 30 yards passed by. Jake started to cry out in pain. "I can't go any further, It HURTS, IT BURNS!!!" "Give me you BEST, Jake you promised me that you wouldn't quit, NOW GO."
At this point, the other team members started to take notice that Jake was really laboring and more than that he was going further than even they expected a man could go. As the coach, who now was screaming at the top of his lungs, slammed the ground in demanding the very last bit of strength that Jake had in him continued on. Jake strained and stretched to muster his very best for his coach and for his promise.
Finally, he could go no further. Jake collapsed in sheer exhaustion. The coach said, "Take off your blindfold Jake, you've just carried a 150lb man on your back over 100yards". "Don't you ever tell me you can't do anything. You've just got to believe in yourself and believe that God is able to give you the strength to accomplish the task."
This story above all illustrates that with man all things are impossible. Whether is be to invent the cure for some dreaded disease or solve some age old problem, like running the mile in under 4minutes. But with God all things are possible. Is there some dream that you have feared starting because you've felt that you are wholly inadequate for the task? Well let me encourage you, The only goal that is not achieved is the one that is not pursued" Pursue your dreams friends, pursue it with the determination of one who wants to give their best, their very best and see what kind of results you get. Like Jake, you may achieve exceedingly abundantly more than you could ask for or even imagine.

End of Year Reflections

What a crazy year this has been. I've gone from riches to rags and back again. Never has the Ray family gone thru so much turbulent waters, all in the same year. Oh there were those early years, when we ate beans and alot of rice month after month but that was when I was going to school and the kids were too young to realize that we were stone cold broke.
We had this Chevy Blazer that needed a new transmission or motor every six months or so. We would have to put the tab on a credit card because we didn't have the funds in the bank. As the years went on we were able to weather the storm much better. I had a great job and the money wasn't an issue. Now things have come full circle and I feel like either we will start all over again or maybe we are going to learn something from the past and this time we are just getting our SECOND WIND.
Now 20 years later my life is totally different. I don't do the same things that I used to do. I don't think the same way. I've gained a bit of weight but nothing too obvious. Yeah, all in all the Ray household has changed. The kids are all grown up now and in fact, we have 8 grandchildren. We've started new businesses and even today my schedule is run by me and not by some boss telling me what to do on an hourly basis.
So what does the future hold for me and my family? That's really what the next 2 weeks is all about. In the next short days that end the year 2010, Linda and I will mapout what we will and won't do in the year 2011. I can tell you now that part of what we won't be doing is wasting time. I can't tell you how much time I've wasted in the last year. Time spent watching television or chasing this venture or that idea. At the tender age of 49 I'm starting to focus my attention on the next 40 years. The difference this time is that I don't have any limitations, like not being old enough or can't get the information.
As I was speaking with a group of business men and women this morning, for our weekly networking group, there is so much opportunity out there that I don't have an excuse not to be successful at whatever I put my hand to. All I have to do is decide what is truly important in my life and then pursue it with passion. The key to this whole thing. GET OFF MY BUTT AND DO SOMETHING.
What about you? Is next year going to be yet another year where you just allow life to pass you by without some much as a sniff of its beauty and content? Or are you going to make it a passionate point that you are going to get involved in your future and make things happen? As for me and my house...

Fadi's Opinion

I recently had a meeting with a local businessman in there in our area.  In and of itself is not too unusual.  Because I meet with businessmen all the time.  Sometimes they are aspiring entrepreneurs, businessmen, or multilevel marketing people at this meeting was different.  In the next few days I was going to see a side of America that I do not ever seen before.  The name of the person that I have met with was FADI.  Fadi was an Christian businessman who was born in Lebanon.  At the age of 13 he already had seen combat because he was in the war.  As I spoke to him I could see on his face that he was a man who had seen death, violence and experienced things that we in America have never ever even thought about.  Not only had Fadi experienced war, but when he came over to America he was about to embark on a journey of enlightenment about what Americans were like from a middle Easterners point of view.  Course it was peppered with explicative’s that I dare not repeat hear but to be sure his speech was very colorful, in a broken English type of tone.

Here’s how the whole thing went. As Fadi and I drove back from a business transaction he kept saying, “ I can speak to you like I know you forever”, so I must tell you. My son… and then he went on to tell me about some of the problems that his beautiful son was having in school. This was a really sad tale. This poor kid got really screwed. Have you ever been the only kid in school with a pair of overalls? Or maybe you were walking the wrong way down a busy corridor? It seems like this kid was in an environment where he was just going in the wrong direction. He wasn’t fully American or should I say Anglo and he wasn’t Hispanic. He looked Hispanic but the kids just didn’t accept him as a Lebanese. As a result he was being picked on year after year. It all came to a head in an incident that ended his stay in our school system. When I heard the story I got really incensed. It wasn’t right that someone who was different had to be subjected to such ridicule. When I was in high school there was a girl, we’ll just call her JB, she was treated in much the same manner. That left awful scars on her emotionally.

Fadi’s son didn’t deserve that treatment. That was act number one.

Act two was my new found friends take on the social system of how we Americans treat our elderly. Fadi’s ex-wife seemingly couldn’t handle the fact that her in-laws were going to be a part of her life on a permanent basis. What I mean is that, they were going to be staying with them. This, according to Fadi was the reason why his wife left. OK, so this isn’t so unusual but this only speaks to the fact that as a society we have more compassion on animals, than we have on our elderly parents, or for that matter the homeless that live on our streets. (authors opinion). Fadi expressed that we have a preoccupation with animals in this country and not on people.

Let’s move on. He had a definite opinion on how we handle people on welfare and the whole cradle to grave mentality of the political parties that represent us on capitol Hill. According to this veteran of war, if we don’t do something about how people take responsibility for their own actions, i.e. pregnancy, drug abuse, illiteracy, etc… then we as a country are committing social suicide.

I wish I could spend more time talking about how angry my friend was about the social condition of this country but I just don’t have time nor space. I just wanted you to get the jist of how passionate other people, who come from foreign lands view their new country. They love this country like none other. They can’t stand the gangs, druglords and apathy within our schools. They see a disintegration of the social fiber in our country. We have throwaway babies and pedigree poodles existing in the same city. All they ask for is the chance to prosper and protect the country that they now call home. Welcome to all of those who yearn for freedom and the chance for a new life, here in America. VIVA America.

Believe In Yourself

Let me tell you a story about some good fortune that came my way this week. I have been really struggline for many months since I changed careers midlife. Bills have been piling up and to tell you the truth I have been getting a little down on myself. Oh, I've kept up a good front. You know what I mean, I've always answered "Fine" when asked how I'm doing. When it was time for prayer in church, I, of course, would stay seated choosing rather to anonymously slip a piece of paper in the prayer box at the back of the room. Yeah I've really been struggling. The funny thing about it all is that I've taught people for years how to become prosperous and be Leaders and all that stuff. I've never ever found myself on the short end of the stick because all of my earthly needs had always been taken care of.
Now I find myself trying to eek out an existence waiting for something to break, and hopefully a break in the right direction. Well that thing finally happened but it wasn't by coincidence or luck that it happened. My break came out of a principle that is at work in all situations that we find ourselves in. That process is the process of sowing and reaping. What do I mean by sowing and reaping? Well let me tell you.
For many years, I've always taught and been  taught to give. When you give you activate some pretty heady things in the atmosphere. Without going into a huge Christian thesis on the subject, it looks something like this. When you workout everyday, eat the right kinds of food and get plenty of rest, what is the natural outcome? That's right, you get stronger body parts and you feel much better.  Next, what happens when you surround yourself with positive people, read energizing, uplifting books and don't allow negative influences around you? Absolutely, you become a more positive and happy person. In fact, you even begin to do things that go along with being a positive person. You start to look forward to seeing people. Only positive people. Your fear factor starts to diminish. In my life that took the form of getting off of my backside and start really investing in more people and developing my team in business.
Here's the outcome. After really spending time in prayer, reflection and study things started to change for me. And I don't mean just a small change, I mean a huge change. People started to treat me differently, because they saw me as a different person. I was able to speak to people, with an authority that I didn't know that I had. And guess what, I never saw it coming. I literally was able to change overnight but not overnight. The change took place so gradually and progressively that it was undetectable, even to me.
I want you to try an experiment. For the next 10 days, spend as much time on study and meditation on where you see yourself going as you do on trying to get there. Does that make sense? If you sell on a daily basis, then you should be studying about sales every day for the days that you actually are selling. See if things don't begin to change for you. It is an amazing principle that you will witness. You will begin to change. You can't help but change. Everytime that you put another tidbit of knowledge and inspiration into your psyche you will change.
At the end of the 10 days, set another goal to do another 10 days. Repeat this process for as long as it takes for you to see some miraculous changes in your life. If you are like me and I know that you are, by the end of 30 days you are going to begin to reap a harvest of prosperity and influence that you've never experienced before. And it all started by you doing a simple thing. Believe in Yourself.

See the Ship Sailing

The Lovely Mrs Ray and I have decided that we are going to plan for our future. One of the things that WE'VE decided to do is plan on moving to Florida in the next 3 years and open a business down there. We're extremely happy and expectant about the upcomeing move. So this is what we've done.
First of all we decided that we would start positioning ourselves for the move. That means selling everything that we don't plan of taking and lightening our financial load here in Vegas.
That's not what I want to relate to you but everything is relational. So I put my beloved 1998 Ford F-150 in the paper. I entitled the add Red Hot Chilli Pepper and within 5 hours I had 5 offers for my truck. I was almost panicking because I love my truck. When I say that I love my truck you must understand this, I bought that dear sweet truck as a present for myself upon graduating from 5 years of schooling. So only 2 people have ever driven my truck and only a handful of people have ever even washed her either. I have never had a bit of trouble with her, so it is hard for me to even think that I would ever sell her.
I called one of the guys on the list and he came over to see her. Before I walked out the door I made sure that I put some business cards in my pocket. I figured that if this guy didn't buy my truck I would at least tell him about the opportunity I could give him.
After test driving the truck Fadi, the guy looking to buy my truck kind of hymmed and hawd about it being a stick shift and how his son, whom he wanted to purchase the truck for, wouldn't be able to handle the mechanics. I went into pivot mode and started to tell him about where Linda and I wanted to move and how we had started a new business and all. I was being as sincere as I could be. I knew that the truck was probably going to be a bust so why not tell him about my business.

Count Me In

Fadi is a business man. He already has a business and so he recognized the potential of my business from the first mention of it. He is from Lebanon and for the past numbe of years has tried to build his own business in the Vegas valley. The reason why I know that he got it was that he tried to contact me about the opportunity 3 times the rest of the day. He even tried to contact me the following day. I was really stoked. He told me that not only was he really super interested in the business but that he had already started speaking with other people who like wise might be able to get involved. We call these kind of people RED APPLES. These are the kind of people who are so ripe for the right opportunity that you don't have to try and convince them about your opportunity. They already see it and know it will work. Fadi didn't know how to make money yet and yet he was sold.
Why is it that foreigners come over to this country and are able to amass fortunes in such a short time and we Americans, the smartest a brightest, most industriours people on the planet are barely able to eek out an existence in the country where we were born? I am truly amazed that some people get it right off the bat and Americans have to see the ship sailing before they believe it will even float.
I spoke to my dad about this same opportunity and bless his heart, he still doesn't see it. I told him, if you could buy land now, knowing what you know about  present, would you buy as much as you could? It was a backdoor attempt at getting him to see the opportunity of my business. I went on to say, that I was going to make a million dollars no matter who else wanted to but that I wanted My Family to prosper. He still needs more time to think about it. Most of us have been presented with crazy opportunities to become part of billion dollar companies or multi-million dollar ideas and have passed them up. I have a friend who passed on Google and Starbucks, any one of those would have made him crazy rich. Now what about you? Are you going to continue to sit on the sidelines of life and watch others take the chances and reap the harvest of untold millions or are you going to get into the game of life and take your swings at everything that looks and feels promising?
The sure thing is this. If you shoot for the stars and miss it it is better than shoot for poop and catching it.

Who Hit Me Who Hit Me

This is the last of my revelations for one day. This one is a doosy.
So I'm standing in this prayer meeting and I'm praying about prosperity and all that Christiany stuff. You know, pleading the blood, all things are possible. All the stuff that we GOOD christians are supposed to be praying. I turned to a passage in my Thinline Bible, Deuteronomy 28. Ah, I love this section, it speaks all about the blessings  of God. I love to read it when I am really battling. And to tell you the truth I've been battling alot these last few months. My finances are a wreck, for a rich guy, and my body is a wreck, for a divinely whole chap.
So, as I'm reading and prophecying (that means speaking encouraging words ) about the blessings that I just know God wants to lavious upon me, I get this total download from ON HIGH. I hear this voice that says, "Why do you keep praying this same prayer over and over again? You've already got this stuff." Whoa!!! What in the heck was that? What do you mean, "Why do I keep praying these prayers?" I've always been taught to claim the promises of God and that by doing so you are walking in your inheritance because you are proclaiming it out loud.
Once again I hear this voice that said. "Yeah, and you do proclaim my goodness but I've already provided it for you. Now stop proclaiming and check out what is preventing you from claiming your inheritance!!!" Outstanding, I had to chew on that one for a bit. You mean to tell me that there is something that is hindering my inheritance for me and my family? I get it now. It's like someone holding out a juicy ripe fruit in front of you and telling you that here it is yours just take it and between you and the fruit there is a goat that is determined that you aint getting that delicious fruit.
I've been missing the boat on this one. Instead of claiming the fruit, I should be battling the goat. Instead of continually only looking at the prize. I need to watchout for the horns that keep stabbing me in the stomach and punching me in the solar plexes. Paul, the apostle said that he kept his eye on the prize yes but he also said to be weary of an evil force that was lurking around waiting to get those who weren't aware that he was truly there.
My prayer changed. I stopped praying for prosperity and started binding and loosing. I stopped worryin about getting more and started to focus on defeating those arrows that have been ravishing my body and my family. No longer am I on the defense but now I am on the offense. I'm off of the give me more God kick and on the put me in the game coach, I want to kick some butt.
You can't go around life waiting for things to happen. Even in a spiritual sense. You aren't command to wait on the Lord like stand still and wait. You are commanded to be ever looking for His direction. That is active waiting. When you are actively waiting you are moving forward, as a door opens up you move through it. When another door opens up, you move through it. All the while you are taking land. You are acquiring property.

Coins Precious Coins

I'm on this lost pennies/coins kick recently but I think that it has alot to say about the condition of man and how we view each other. Like I said in an earlier posting, there are many people who are out there for whatever reason. They could have been a mass murderer or a pimp. White-collar criminal or a run of the mill hustler that got caught. The point is that they are all people. We are all just that people. The only difference between me and some guy who has spent 20+ years in SingSing is that He got caught and I didn't. Crazy revelation huh?
Well why is it then that when we talk about doing something for the down and out that we bristle with indignation when we mention those people who got caught? I mean we believe that we have it so all together that we can sit up in our high and lofty chair and look down our boney noses at that guy who got caught and say that he aint good enough to be afforded the same grace that kept us out of stir? Crazy man.
Recently we were trying to decide how we were all going to invite people to a certain production. It was really heady. The suggestions started flying all around the room. People were really buying into the whole thing. These are the kind of meetings that you all want to be a part of. How can we get this many and how can we attract those. It was really cool. Then came the 800lb gorilla into the room. How about inviting a butt load of convicts? They've served their time and it would be cool to invite them too.
You could almost feel the tension begin to rise in the room. The excitement turned from fantastic to spastic. Now I'm not saying that there was a full-scale mutiny but there wasn't a sense of the ahah that there should have been.
Here's the revelation.
When people, no matter what they have done are plucked out of the destiny that evil wants to lock them into, then we have just seen a miracle. Put another way. People weren't meant for failure, they were meant for victory. When we can pluck someone out of failure and put them on track for victory, we should be jumping up and down.
I hope you are getting this. I get the biggest rush when I see someone who is definitely going down, get their mojo together and start moving in the other direction. It tells me that there is hope for everyother son of a gun out there. I've seen ex-cons and prostitutes do some amazing things in my time. They have made a decision to stop taking what life is giving them and started fighting for what they are supposed to be having.
That is some serious mojo my brotha. That is what life is all about. It is about you taking life by the horns and going for the gusto. Cliche maybe but appropriate.

Lost Pennies

I was in a prayer meeting recently when I had this awesome revelation. Many people fall away from the organizations that they have been a part of for many years for many different reasons. It could be social, or economic reasons, whatever the reason, it happens. I found myself in this same place.
I have been going through some physical and emotional things recently and maybe you can relate to them. You can put up a strong face for a long time. In my case it was for several months. There was a time when I was making a generous salary. More than generous. I was living a lifestyle that many would say is lavious. I'm not saying that I was eating caviar or steak tartar every weekend but I was flying and buying with no care in the world that this lifestyle would ever end, at least not soon.
Then the walls came crushing in all around me. It all happened so suddenly that I couldn't appreciate the gravity of it all until many months later. I had been hit by a trifecta of money, body and children. The dreaded three things that can drive a man over the edge.
Without going into too much detail, my finances went from hero to zero in a matter of a few months. Physically, I was a mess. I had to have minor shoulder surgery which would drain the life out of me because I'm used to being physical and strong. Then it was the anguish of having a child that became the proverbial prodigal child. This went on for months and months.
Little by little the finances became more and more of a struggle. I owned property and a retirement but was unable to get at either one of those. I said to myself,"Well I must be the richest poor guy in the neighborhood." Haha. I was just fooling myself. Iwas living on borrowed time and I knew it better than anyone else that it was just a matter of time until the bottom dropped out of this puppy.
Little did I know but I was staying home more often. I wasn't making the phone calls or going to the meetings as often. I even stopped going in to the office. I started working more and more out of my Home office. I rationalized that I was saving money and since my bank account was as thin as Twiggy back in the 60's, it made sense. But the walls of depression were closing in all around me. I just couldn't get out of the funk.
Then one day I woke up and listened to that still small voice that said to get up out of bed and go to the prayer meeting that I hadn't been to in several weeks. I immediately got up and put on my jeans and raced out of the house. I saw the sun rising and the cars bussling to and fro. It was an amazing feeling. I felt alive again. Just by going out of the house I felt alive again.
Here's the revelatory part. As I stood in the meeting, only one person said to me that they had noticed I hadn't been there. He said that he had been praying for me and that I just showed up and made his day. This was the revelation. Many people don't listen to that still small voice that says, "Get back into the game". They continue to wallow outside and many never make it back. I am the lucky one. I teach this stuff all the time and still have reserves of faith and hope that reside inside of me just waiting for moments like these. Many people aren't as fortunate. For those, who will call them? Who will be the one to help them back? I can tell you, it wasn't easy for me to get up out of that bed but I did. By God's grace I did. And the most crushing thing about this whole thing, no one else even missed me. They acted as though I had been there all the time.

Take It From Me

Life can throw you for a loop or you can take life by the horns and make of it what you want it to be. For instance there is a couple I know. They fell in love but shortly after living together the marriage fell apart. I mean it fell hard. The kind of breakup that is only written about in movies. It got so bad that when he came home to see if there was anything to salvage from the marriage she had left him without even so much as a pair of underwear. Now that is bad.
These two could have had a wonderful life together but they decided that it just wasn't worth the struggle to make it work. Marriage for them just wasn't that important. Many people look at their walks with God or their businesses the same way. They feel that the struggle to keep it all together just aint what they are willing to go through.
Whatever your situation today might be, purpose in your heart that you will do all that you can to get to the next level. Whether it be with a spouse, your children or for that matter your business. You have to make it abundantly clear that you are not going to give in or give up to the temptation of throwing in the towel.
You can quit anytime, so why not just decide to give up next week or next year. Every time that you delay that temptation to give up one more day later you give your psychi a bit more time to toughen up and recharge your batteries. We all need a breather from the constant barrage of negativity and complaining. Mostly from our own mind we send these signals. This silencing of the voices of doubt in our own heads may be the only voice of reason that we hear. So today, just decide to STOP feeding yourself the negative self-talk of destruction.

Read a book, or listen to a motivational tape that helps to uplift you. Read the bible in the psalms or ask someone you know that always has a positive word for you. Whatever you do don't give in. Don't give up and Take it from me, never, never surrender.

Leaders Lead All the Time

Sometimes it is hard to turn off the whole leadership thing. I mean whether I go to family gatherings, social outings or just to watch a show I find myself engaging in activities that I've taught people throughout the years that they should use in their pursuit of getting to the top. But when I teach people about Maxwells Law of
Attraction or the Law of the Lid, I don't mean for it to be a 24hr thing. Hopefully I was thinking, it would be something that they could use on a need only basis but if you are anything like me, you know that once your know the secrets of being a leader, it is impossible to turn them off.

Let's talk abit about some leadership principles that each of us must employ in order to get the job done. Whether you are trying to be the leader in a church or an industrial plant the principles and outcomes are the same. Even if you work in a field where the people are hard to work with, as I did when I worked in the construction field, principles are principles and can be adapted to make them work.

What is Leadership? Leadership is the ability to influence. It is the act of getting people to do what you want them to do for your mutual benefit. There have ben great leaders throughout history and we could spend the rest of time talking about them but each of them whether they were Patton or Jobs were able to influence people to get a job done.

Just because you have never been a formal leader today doesn't mean that you can't learn to be one. There have been 1000's of books written on the subject and countless number of people has gone to seminars and bought these books to develop the skill of being a leader. So don't believe it when someone tells you that you don't have what it takes. Everyone can learn to be a leader. I am convinced that only your desire and exposure to leadership principles and mentoring have kept you from becoming the leader which latentally lies within you.

If you find that your life isn't where you want it to be. If you haven't achieved some great successes in your life yet. When you walk into the room and things don't change as a result of you walking into the room, then maybe it's time for you to start looking at getting on a serious leadership training schedule. It isn't something that you  will learn overnight but it is something that you will develop.
Check out my leadership Development video and see if it doesn't make a difference in your business and life.

Take Charge Before It's Too Late

We all want to live happy, productive lives. Lives full of excitement or at least fullfilling in some way or another. The problem with most folks is that they don't know how to go about living that life. So what do they do? They go from job to job looking for the answer to their quest. Or they settle in a lifestyle that is at best frustrating or boring. You may know of people like that.They are the kind of person who makes fun of everyone who does something special in life. They are critical, sourpusses that most people really don't like being around. Then there's the person who is always depressed and makes it their lifes mission to take as many people as possible down that slippery slope of misery with them. You know the old saying. "Misery loves company"? Well that saying probably was coined to describe the person who isn't living up to their potential in life.

Well, I want to help you to not become a person like that. If you want to become a successful person in life, then there are some crucial things that you are going to have to do and not tomorrow but today. I can guarantee that if you just do half of these things that you are going to see a marked change in your life in a positive direction.

First of all is that you need to begin to take a real hard look at yourself and admit that you are in a rut in life. You know what a rut is don't you? It is a coffin with the ends kicked out of it. And if you don't change your life today you might as well consider yourself dead to everyone else.

Next, you must write down some goals on where you want to be tomorrow, 3 months from now and 5 years from today. If you can't visualize where you want to be, then how are you ever going to know what you are shooting for. A wise man said, " If you shoot for the stars and miss it is better than if you shoot for crap and hit it."

Next find a mentor that can help you get to where you want to go. Many of us are tempted to call upon our old friends. You know, the ones we've been wallowing in the muck of life for many years. But I am going to suggest that you seek out wise counsel from an industry leader or someone who you admire and is willing to teach you.

Finally, get up off the couch, from off the computer or the idiot box and get back into the game of life. This crucial that you start putting you plan into action. Without action you can have all the best ideas and hopes in the world and still fail. You have to put your plans and ideas into motion.

Hope this has helped. For a better description of these and other helpful hints be sure to subscribe to my blog. It is an invaluable part of your week. Just write to shermray@gmail.com and say sign me up.

Social Media Mashup

Thanks for checking out my periodic updates. Todays tip is a site called TweetDeck.com
This awesome application helps when you have more than one social media site that you have to keep track of at the same time. Check it out. You won't be able to take your eyes off of all the content that all ofyour friends are throwing at you.
For more info check me out on Facebook.com/shermanray

Who Am I

I was listening to a renowned author and speaker T Harv Eker, today and as I was listening to him I realized that, just like most of the people who call themselves, "GURU", they all speak truths that I have found in my most favored books. The Bible. Now before you turn off let's face some facts. These people, whether they be Tony Robbins or John Maxwell got their great truths from somewhere. They didn't all just come out of some vacuum. They were passed down the centuries from grandfather to son and down through daughter and mother to Anthony Robbins who now gives it to you and I. Well where did those truths ultimately come from? That's right.
Anyways, here is the great truth that Eker was alluding to. He said that when we look at a problem our final way of dealing with that problem is predicated on how we feel about ourselves. Put another way. We deal with things based upon how we feel about ourselves. If we look at ourselves as though we are small then we will deal with most situations badly because we feel that the situation is so big that little ole us couldn't possibly deal with it.
Eker submits that by growing the US that our problems will begin to get smaller in comparison. Sounds good doesn't it. And in most circles people can deal with that pretty effectively. We get more training, go to rah rah programs or get a LIFE COACH to tell us that we are okay but really are we dealing with the core problem?
In the book of Exodus we meet a man with the same sort of problem His name was Moses. He was a military man who lived in the halls of Pharoahs palace. He commanded the armies and then the construction of vast kingdoms for his adoptive family but when he found himself in the wilderness of the Sinai desert he faced his biggest fears. He stood face to face with God and it was at that point that he had to either put up or shut up and let go and let God.
God told Moses that he had a plan for him and that this entailed going up against his once secure loving family the Egyptians and convince Pharoah to let the Israelites go. Crazy, in the natural yes , but not in the eyes of He who was sending him.
For sake of time and space. We all face those giants in our lives. Whether it be business, family or whatever we all face them. The issue isn't whether you will face them it is HOW you will face them. Will you be like Moses and make excuses on how we can't do things or are we going to just be goofy enough to believe that this inspiration we were given is of God and that if it is, that He will provide a way to accomplish it.
In Moses' case God said that He would provide proofs all along the way to reassure Moses that he wasn't accomplishing anything but that he was mearly a tool. We find this same sort of thing at play whenever we accomplish those big mergers or that chance meeting with the most important person in the company.
I recently added someone to my business and didn't even expect this person to show up. That's when you know it's a God thing.
So, get the training, attend the meetings, do the work but know who ultimately is getting the glory.

Growing is Good

Take it from me growing a new business is never an easy thing to do. There are papers to file, people to call, planes to catch to get advice from this guru and that expert. I can't tell you how hard it is to make that first call to tell your friends that you've just started your own thing. What will they say? Will they remember that you started a new thing just 4 weeks ago? Will they ask about that other New Thing that you started last year. It was supposed to be the REAL thing.
But you know in your heart of hearts that this time this is going to be the business that is going to make you uber rich. You will sit on top of the heap this time and all the naysayers will rue the day that they called you a flake or that you couldn't stick to one thing.
That's the hardest part about starting your own business. You spend half of your time trying to justify your dream to everyone who is the most important in your life. Your mom, dad and oh yea of course your best friend that you tried to get involved in your for sure business, all of them have to sign off on your life's dream.
The truth is none of those people really have to be able to signoff on YOUR dreams. They are your dreams and the sooner you realize that the better off you will be. YOU have to live the rest of YOUR life and no one else is going to be able to do that for you. So take some advice from somebody who has changed course more than a couple of times in life, STOP LETTING OTHERS LIVE YOUR LIFE FOR YOU